Realism vs. Optimism

You give a little, you get a little reward. You give a lot, you get a little reward. In all my wanderings, I'm beginning to question whether it is possible to do it all.....within the confines of what is available. For example, I'd like to see the world, travel without destination, kneel down in the street of a place that begins to blend in with all the others and just be thankful that I am alive. I want to get drunk in a tavern of a town so small that there is no name. I want to look into someone's eyes, and communicate with emotion and without words. There is so much to see, but how is it possible?

I just wish I had some time to enjoy them.
Today is the perfect example of my life. I get up, throw on some clothes, spray some perfume so that I may maintain that feminine persona even though sometimes I feel more like a slug, I work, I sit for like 5 minutes and cram in some homework into my overlly swollen brain, and then go back to work.

Everyday we wander through life trying not to stumble upon our own thoughts while making certain that our focus lies straight ahead and avoids the obvious flaws around us that scream for our attention. I can't honestly say that my life up till this point has even begin to live up to the expectations that we are taught to place upon ourselves, but I can say that I am painfully aware of the days that pass by, and with them comes new expectation.
My father is a realist. The perfect picture of practicality with just enough cynicism that it makes you smile. I learned from him that you must always have a goal, some guidelines to follow. Without them, life would be nothing more than a biology experiment gone wrong.